Recently, with the warmer weather, and having a lot of time on my hands again, I turn to thinking about just last year this time of year. I was a missionary in a place called Murfreesboro, Tennessee (the exact center of Tennessee). I was with a sister that I got along with amazingly well (probably almost better than most of my other companions), and things seemed to be going pretty good. We didn't have a lot of people to teach, so we spent a lot of time trying to find more people to teach. There had been a tornado not too long ago (the Friday before Easter last year, which seems like it was around this time of year). It was extremely warm outside (we were just getting to the weather where we stepped outside for 5 minutes and were drenched in sweat), and life was good. I remember a couple people in particular in that area that we enjoyed visiting a lot, and remember the times we had with them quite fondly.
In the present day, and not a year ago, things are not quite the same. I'm in southeast Idaho, going to school, and have roommates that are...interesting. I read about a friend who is changing jobs, and feel's like he is dying to the world he knew. He had a purpose in life, and people he cared about. As I think back on the time I had in Murfreesboro, it makes me feel almost like I have no purpose in life right now. I'm just kind of going through life with no direction. I miss having that daily purpose of bringing others closer to Christ, and helping them come to understand better that He is their Savior. Life was good, and always full of things that needed to be done. It was full of people who wanted to listen to us (as well as people who definitely did not want to listen to us), and running to and fro from appointment to appointment, just to find out the people we had most hoped to be there decided they really didn't want to listen to us.
I miss those days a lot. I want to go back, want to have things in my life that seem of greater importance. Education is important, yes, but it doesn't feel important right now. I feel like I am wasting a lot of time, trying to figure out what I need to be doing in life.
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1 year ago