Mom amuses me sometimes. dad has had an emergency cell phone for a while now, and it's made perfect sense as to why he has it. he's driving an hour from home every day, and out in the middle of nowhere most of that drive, so if he breaks down, he needs a way to tell someone to come and rescue him. it makes sense. i guess mom got jealous recently, because she insisted that we get her one for emergency purposes too. it doesnt make as much of sense, because she stays pretty well within walking distance of anything if she were to break down. so, we got her one. but, now she needs to learn how to use it. apparantly she thinks the one person at home who can teach her how to use it is the one person in the family who doesnt have a cell phone? i'm lucky i know how to use one though, because she refuses to let dad teach her how. "how do i make a call min? min, how do i check my messages?" honestly, the only way i figured out how to make her phone do what it is supposed to is by playing, and oopsing, and messing about on it. i told her that she should try it and see if she can figure out how to make it work that way, but she wont. it's been amusing teaching her though. maybe when i get home from my mission, i'll be able to convince her that the family should get some with a real provider (verizon would be nice, because i know lots of people on verizon, and there's that whole free verizon to verizon calling thing...) and i would actually communicate with my family. on the other hand, maybe i'll wait a few years yet.
this was our Home teaching message for the month. the bishop (who is our home teacher) has a daughter serving a mission, and she sent this to him, and he shared it with us. i'm sharing with you all.
The Way It Is THE MISSION PRESIDENT: Leaps tall buildings in a single bound, Is more powerful than a locomotive, Is faster than a speeding bullet, Walks on Water, Associates with God.
ASSISTANT TO THE PRESIDENT: Leaps short buildings in a single bound, Is more powerful than a switch engine, Is just as fast as a speeding bullet, Walks on water if the sea is calm, Talks with God.
THE ZONE LEADER: Leaps short buildings with a running start and favourable winds, Is almost as powerful as a switch engine, Is faster than a decelerating bullet, Walks on water in an indoor pool, Talks with God if special request is approved.
THE DISTRICT LEADER: Barely clears a mud hut, Loses tug-of-war with locomotives can fire a speeding bullet, swims well, Is occasionally addressed by God
THE SENIOR COMPANION: Makes high marks on the wall when trying to leap tall buildings, Is run over by locomotives, Can somtimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury, Dog Paddles, Talks to animals.
THE JUNIOR COMPANION: Runs into buildings, Recognizes locomotives 2 out of 3 times, Is not issued ammunition, Can stay afloat with a life jacket, Talks to walls.
THE GREENIE: Falls over doorsteps when trying to enter buildings. Says "Look at the choo-choo!" Wets himself with a water pistol, Plats in mud puddles Mumbles to himself
THE SISTER MISSIONARIES: Lifts buildings and walks under them, Kicks locomotives off the tracks, Catches speeding bullets with her teeth and eats them, Freezes water in a single glance, Knows God.
my alarm goes off, but something is wrong. its a saturday. this is my first inclination that today is going to be a long day. i lie on the floor, hoping i didnt wake rachel up, waiting for mom or dad to get up. since its a saturday, i'm not allowed up before them. so i wait. i think about getting in the bed with rachel, it would be a lot more comfortable than the floor, and i might be able to fall back asleep. my mind eventually wanders to California, my mind has been spending a lot of time there recently. i try to pull my mind to the future. just not too far. thoughts about after my mission have been depressing, thoughts about the past are no better, being filled with "if only i had said/come this this way, instead of that way." the present is no better. thoughts there only lead to thinking about whta stupid inane things mom and dad will argue about today. will it be another day full of pointless arguements about forgetting a salad, about cleaning the kitchen floor, not running the dishwasher, or about me? i notice that since i've got my mission call, i get argued about a lot as though i'm not even in the room. and when i ask them to stop, i just get yelled at too. finally someone gets up. its mom. she starts to go about her normal saturday morning routine of renewing the books, and mumbling to me about how dad isnt making breakfast yet. i want to tell her to lay off, but dont quite feel couragous enough to be yelled at. not yet today. especially since rachel just came in the room, and i want tto spend happy time with rachel, not guilty time. mom seems to have this amazing ablitly to make you feel guilty, even though you were in the right, and not her. the day moves on, going fairly smoothly until we find out Natalie cant come to discovery gateway with us. we were celebrating rachel's birthday a few weeks late, and she is dissapointed natalie cant go. she was really looking forward to it. mom and dad start to argue right there in the library. i feel myself slipping farther down the dark path of dispare. for rachel, i make myself stay happy, and help to find another alternitive. we will still go to discovery gateway, but is there another friend that you want to take with instead? i ask. we end up taking kassie, the neighbour girl that no is is quite sure how the two of them remain friends. before we can go, we have to attend a viewing. why cant we just skip it, i ask. apparantly mom and dad are "obliged" to go. we pick up kassie, and go to the viewing. dad gets us lost, but because kassie is with us, mom doesnt yell. rachel is happy about this, but obviously expected mom to start yelling. i feel bad for rachel that she had to get used to that too. after the viewing, we go to the gateway. everything goes fine, and mom is actually plesent to be around. it is a different story after we get back home. we have messages on the answering machine. one is for me, i am supposed to go clean the church. another is for rachel. because natalie couldnt come to discovery gateway with you, do you want to come to a barbeque with us tonight? the last one is for mom and dad, reminding them about a barbeque that they have to go to too. lucky for me, rachel wants someone to go with her, so i get to go. instead of going to clean the church, i take a nap. if i want to be at all plesent at this barbeque, i need to take a nap, but mom doesnt seem to understand, and starts to yell at me. i dont have the energy to fight back, so i pretend to fall asleep instead. it is the wrong move, i know, and mom hates me for it. for "not fulfilling your obligation" i must actually fall asleep at some point, because rachel is later sent in to wake me up. "mindy we need to go" how can i refuse her? i need to get out of the house. we bike over to the barbeque. i am glad to be rid of mom and dad for a few hours. rachel goes and plays, and of course, i'm stuck talking with the adults. "how's the mission prep. comming?" well. we still hvae lots to do, but i guess overall, its going pretty well. "what are you most excited about your mission?" leaving my parents for a while, with limited contact, i think. out loud, i say its just an overall exciting feeling." "what do you think it will be like?" i dont know, i've never done this have i? i think. but i answer it will be awesome to serve the Lord and teach his gospel. they talk about something else for a while, and i'm free to go play with the kids and help build the fire for the barbeque. i listen to their family. i never hear an arguement break out, even the many times that if i had been at home, one would have broken out. its dinner time, and as we are all gathered eating they start to quiz me about my mission again. God, i think, immediately berating myself for letting work have such an influence on what i think, cant they ask me about anything else? eventually, when the kids are all back playing, my wish is granted and they ask me about rachel. "is she doing alright? she has friends where she is living?" they eventually throw out the statement that "you're kinda like her mom aren't you? her mom, her big sister, her aunt. you were a lot of different hats." gosh, if only they knew the truth as to just how connected me and rachel have become. they would never immagine. suddenly, as they talk endlessly to me, i relize that jen's kids, and especially rachel, are the only ones in my family that i have ever been able to show love to, and say "i love you" to. even as a kid, i couldnt show it. finally the barbeque ends, and we go home. mom tells us about the barbeque that they went to, never asking me or rachel how ours was. then one thing she says to me hits me, and not in a happy way. "i told brother bitters that rachel seemed excited to come visit us this weekend, but i think that really, she was just excited to see you." God, again berating myself immediately, can she make me feel any more guilty for leaving? i hope that's not true, is all that i can manage to say. i make sure to give rachel an extra long hug that night before she goes to bed. i only wish that day could have lasted longer, so i could do what i want with her, tell her what i want, and make absolutely sure that she knows i love her. my rachel, i say, and nobody elses. "my mindy" she says, "and nobody elses" i dont want to let her go, knowing just how dark the withdrawls are going to hit sunday night when she is no longer at our house.
I was watching Star Treck the other day (i've been on a star treck kick, and have some of the series check out from the library), and one of the episodes that i was watching was about an intern that they picked up and brought on board. she turned out to be one of the Q. she had to make a decision as to if she wanted to be one of the Q, or if she would make herself not use her powers, and live onboard the Enterprise. it made me stop and think, what would i do if i were placed in that situation? now, i'll stop and explaine what exactly a Q is, for those who might not know. a Q is, simply put in his own words, an omnipotent being, who can do whatever they like. they can make things appear, dissapear, live wherever, do whatever (to a point) at their whim. they can live in space without any space suit, they can make all the jewels in the world appear, they can make someone fall in love with them. whatever they want, they can get. they can take any shape they want, as well. this girl, amanda the intern, comes onboard the Enterprise and suddenly starts showing Q powers. she is faced with the decision of being able to use her powers and live (in the continum, of course), or die. what plesent options, no? in the end, she chose to be able to use her powers, but she only used them for the good of others. would i have chosen the same, and used the same nobility? i like to think so, but at the same time, i'm not at all certian. since i am just a mear mortal, i might just end up being all selfish and using it for my own wants. there are many things i would change about my life, but also about things around me. it would be an interesting conundrum to be in, and one i'm happy i dont have to be in. i dont think i would make the right choice
A - Attached or single? SOOO way single, you wouldnt believe, with no prospects of changing that. i'd not oppose to a change though. B - Best friend? a tie between Sean and Rachael L. C - Cake or pie? pie. D - Day of choice? wednesdays E - Essential item? depends on the project. my leatherman is always handy though... F - Favorite color? Purple G - Gummy bears or worms? worms H - Hometown? West Valley City, UT, but i wouldnt mind changing it I - Indulgences? sleeping till 7 on sundays J - January or July? January :) K - Kids? don't i wish L - Life isn't complete without? Family and friends M- Marriage date? lets talk about getting a boy first N- Number of brothers and sisters? three sisters, and two and 4/2 brother's-in-law O - Oranges or apples? both P - Phobias or fears? water, hights, and the unknown Q - Quote? i dont have a favourite at the moment R - Reason to smile? Rachel S- Season of choice? spring T - Tag six: anyone who might read this who hasnt done it already U - Unknown fact about me? I don't think I have one. V - Vegetable? anything but asperagus, beans, and brussle sprouts W - Worst habit? using the word "chudder" for _everything_ X - X-ray or ultrasound? neither one. Y - Your favorite food? most anything? i'm not picky Z - Zebra or horse? neither one.
I'm riding along on my bike. It's a race! but, I'm not supposed to be there. BJ is supposed to. not me. but i have to be. a mob is after BJ, and she can't be shot. other people i know are also in the race. RL, MC, SG, JW, all in the race, and i'm actually keeping up with them. but someone is in the mob. we pass the next to last marker. suddenly. its just me, SG, and MC. everyone else has finished. out of the blue, SG pulls out a gun, "Get her gone!" MC yells. i dont know what they mean, but guess they must be in the mob. SG aims at me, and as i panic, i pull far ahead and finish the race. just as i pass the finish line, SG shoots, twice, and his aim is sure. both times. i'm thrown from my bike and fall to the ground. a pain in my left side. "at least BJ is safe. i did my job." SG comes over to make sure i'm dead, and there he stands, watching me till i die.